Miscellany Me

Well..... so much for being steadfast in blogging.  Its been 6 months and the only thing I can say is... Yep that's me! Sometimes I'm flaky and I let life get to me (read depression and anxiety takes over) and other times I'm hyper aware (read OCD kicks in and I post to the extreme on Instagram).  I want balance, I need balance; I'm trying to balance.   Since the only thing I'm good at right now is flakiness - I'm going to embrace that flakiness.  I am me; in all my weirdness, flakiness, sporadicness - yes I know that's not a word- I am me!  I promise to be steadfast in being me.
I think that's all the Lord was really trying to teach me anyway.  I'm never going to a world reknown blogger, Bible teacher, Phone Photographer, Instagrammer, or Scrapbooker! Shocking I know; but what I am going to be is the best me that God gifted me to be.  I will continue to work on being steadfast in the faith that the Lord has given me.

    "Therefore, my beloved brethern, be ye steadfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain the Lord."      ICor. 15:58

Lord, I'm thankful that you are the God of a bazillion chances.  You never make me feel bad about my choices - indeed you  illuminate my sin and allow me to make the choice to continue or reject my sinful behavior.  Sometimes I make good choices...sometimes not; but in the end, when I confess my sin and repent, You are always there.  Thank you Lord, that you are always there.  So much to say and I forget how much I really like this "thing called blogging", but let's try to temper my enthusiasm with restraint and brevity.

Until  next time...

Abiding in Him,
    Tiff

Picture Perfect Son-day

Picture perfect...
    where I attempt to illustrate (perfectly picture) Scripture.

Today is Son-day (Sunday) so I'm gonna attempt to post my short and sweet thought...

Nothing heavy, yet profound.  Something I need to bear in mind Always - to see your glory around me.  Thank you Lord.

Abiding in Him,
    Tiff

A Bit More Randomness...

So it's been a hot minute since I've posted.  I had started to put myself on a schedule and tried to ensure that I would be posting regularly...well.... as we can see - that didn't happen!  I've been struggling mightily with the death of my Dad and just have been trying to get through the daily process of living.  I've gone to 2 counseling sessions and I must say they have been pretty helpful.  Not in the sense of diagnosis, but in the sense of getting it out.. being able to voice my inner fears and doubts without anyone judging me.

WHEW.....enough already!!!

So back in the saddle again.  A few more random thoughts:

1.  My hunnee helped me download pics from my phone - since that's what I seem to take most of my pics with and now I have room for more.  Yaay me!!

2.  Still doing my OBS, even though I'm not participating online anymore, but the study itself is really helpful and very timely.

3.  Found a new app for my phone called Path and and its like more complete integration of Instagram, FB, Blogger, and Twitter.  I am in love with this app... I've kept my presence completely private and I have been able to upload all kinds of pics, thoughts, books, locations, everything that the other apps can do, I've been able to do... again ..I'M IN LOVE!!

4.  I learned a little bit of how to add text to one of my photos in the MS Paint program.    Kinda fun and frustrating at the same time.  Hopefully I can add the pic to this post. lol  Maybe I can add this as part of my online testimony... an ongoing segment called "photo verse."  Not completely convinced...I'll keep working on it.

Okay, off to post in Path... joy! I'll be back soon to share the verses God gave me during this season.

Abiding in Him,
   Tiff

Random Musings...

With so much going on today...well everyday. I just thought I would put down a few random thoughts that have been occupying me lately.

1.  Decided to watermark my photos moving forward, just because I've been reading a few posts lately that people have been stealing images from blogs and passing them off their own. Now I know that my pics are by no means theft worthy, however, I think I just wanted to prove to myself that I could do it.  And waaalaaa... I did ...yaaay!!

2.  Wanted to participate in the OBS blog hop today, yet somehow I felt myself being rushed to "post something" and I certainly did not want to post that here.  I really have a lot to say, and yet I'm still detemining the appropriate amount of transperancy that I should have on my blog.  So today is short and sweet and mindless.  Maybe tomorrow will be earth shattering, maybe not! Either way, I'm working on being Steadfast in the areas God has clearly given to me!!

3.  Being honest about "time sucks"!!! In the Let.It.Go. OBS Melissa wanted us to get real about what are tools, toys, or tangents ("time sucks") in our life.  Well, I have a couple.  These tangents (ts) have the ability to also affect how I feel and view myself and my life.   Pinterest is my #1 tangent.  I can easily lose myself looking at others' boards, admiring, contemplating, and then berating myself that I hardly ever really make anything that I pin.  My next tangent is my blog roll.  Again, I spend an inordinate amount of time reading, admiring, envying, coveting, berating myself and then feeling overwhelmed that I am not as good as...(insert what ever phase of life i'm focused on - i.e wife, mom, DIL, employee, boss, business owner, creative soul, etc).  It is all vanity.

Then I looked on all the works that my hands had wrought, and on the labour that I had laboured to do:  and behold, all was vanity and vexation of spirit, and there is no profit under the sun.
                                                                                          Ecclesiastes 2:11

     

So instead I'm not going to beat myself up, I'm going to take solace in the progress I'm making.  And here are two of the pics I caught of the sky as I was leaving my Kaiser appt today.  I absolutely love taking pics like these, they really speak to the majesty of the Lord and how we as humans attempt to imitate what He has already created.  It truly is God's Glory!!! AMEN!!

"And God saw every thing that he had made, and behold, it was very good."
                                                                  Genesis 1:31

Abiding in Him.  
     Tiff

My Kryptonite

Kryptonite... that fictional element that could ultimately destroy Superman.  Superman...Superwoman... that's sometimes how I feel or rather how I think I should feel.  I feel like I need to do it all, be it all, become it all - just in order to to be a good wife, good mom, good daughter, friend, employee, manager, christian woman, etc, etc, etc.   

So what's my kryptonite??  My deep seated need (desire) to be "good."  However, the Bible says this about human goodness:

         "They are all gone out of the way, they are together become unprofitable; there is none that doeth good, no, not one."                                       

               Romans 3:12  

So where does this leave me?? Clinging to the Word of God, just where I should be. 

I'm truly in a strange place, a desolate place, an unfamiliar and uncomfortable place.   However, I do KNOW that searching God's Word (not for God, but in His Word) will ultimately shed light on my path.  I have no idea what I'm doing or when I might be out of the valley and on my way to the mountaintop... I just know that I need the Lord to do it.  I will continue to embrace my one word and look to Him for the healing and letting go of behavioral traits that are clearly not of Him.  To this end, I have started an Online Bible Study by Melissa Taylor called Let.It.Go. based on the book written by Karen Ehman.

I pray to stay faithful to this study by continuing to be Steadfast in and through the Lord and that I may use this space as another vehicle to show what the Lord is doing in me and through His Word.  

Abiding in Him, 

    Tiff

P.S. On Wednesday, I hope to reveal the verse God laid upon my heart  - to meditate upon throughout the year.   

Being vs Doing....

As I sit here thinking over the last week of pain, hurt, confusion, and exhaustion...one thought kept coming back to me ...my one word - Steadfast.  I kept asking why and yet You met me with silence.  Maybe You  didn't think I was ready for your answers and You were right.

Over the last 6 months when I thought about participating in a One Word Challenge, my choices were almost always "kinder, softer, others driven" words.  You however kept whispering steadfast and You never gave me peace about any other word until I embraced that. one. word.

I now know (in part) why You gave me steadfast.  As an all-knowing, all-loving, all mercy giving God, You knew that I would need to become steadfast during this time.  Not steadfast in things (Bible reading, prayer, service, organization, etc) - although those things aren't bad; You knew I needed to become steadfast in You!!

For now we see through a glass darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know, even also as I am known.
   1Corinthians 13:12

Steadfast in communing with You; steadfast in knowing that You are a loving God, steadfast in knowing that Your ways are definitely not my ways and your thoughts are higher than mine and that EVERYTHING You do, has an eternal purpose.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD.
   Isaiah 55:8

For I know that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
   Romans 8:18

Thank you Lord for your loving knudges, your loving kindnesses, your tender mercies, your steadfastness to me - even when I resist or doubt You.

Abiding in Him,
    Tiff

Absent from the body....

Jan 15, 2013 was horrible ...the second most horrible day of my 41 years.  The day I found out my Dad died.   He actually died the evening before around 1945 , but of course I didn't find out until I got a call at work the next day. 
The day started out well; I had gotten an early morning love note (text ) from my good friend Trudi and from the time I stepped foot at work ...the day went downhill. 
I spent the next 14 hours begging God for something ...anything ..to help me deal with the despair and disbelief I feel.  God gave me many Scriptures and reminded me of His infinite wisdom...but I still feel LOST!!  I Love my Daddy and am heartbroken. 
I don't think I will be writing anymore about the passing of my Dad..I can not process it..but if God moves me to write about it...I will.
 Abiding in Him,
   Tiff

One Word Wednesdays

Here is the first post in a my year long series (GASP!!) about my one word.  Now that I've written this I'm scared!! I'm also testing out the ability to schedule a post - I'm actually writing this the day before I want it to post...hhmmm guess I'll see how this tuns out.

So my word is Steadfast.  I choose to use the 1828 Merriam Websters Bible Dictionary and the King James Bible as my tangible sources to study being steadfast.

Steadfast:  1.) fast fixed; firm; firmly fixed or established. 2.) Constant; firm; resolute; not fickle or wavering; steady. 3.) Firmness of standing; fixed in place; firmness of mind or purpose; fixed in principle.

The KJV spells steadfast as stedfast - so I will use these interchangeably.

Therefore, my my beloved brehren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord.  
                                       1 Corinthians 1:7

To be honest, I feel overwhelmed and unsure how I should go about my word... as I type this ..it's so like me   to feel I have to be doing something in order to be succeeding.  However, what I do want to do is to create maybe a canvas or a frame with my word and the above verse to keep it in sight and then find a way to visually work on it or study it... not quite sure how that's gonna work...but I'm willing.

I think I might go online to find a few interesting and creative ways to study and showcase the word the Lord gave me.
  
**Next post, I'll share some of the Biblical contrasts between being steadfast and what the Bible calls double minded.**

Thank you Lord for the ability to clearly discern what you have been trying to tell me for the last year, but I apparently was more like a 2yr old and stomped my feet and pouted.  Today Lord, this minute Lord I am willing .. please help me to be steadfast in this journey.  

Abiding in Him, 
  Tiff

Tickled Pink...Orange...Yellow...

I'm soooo tickled pink...yellow...orange..red...and whatever else color that tickles my fancy!! I was able to add my One Word Button and its so pretty!!! Yaaay!!  I've also been to remain steadfast with my documenting of 1000 Gifts.. God is so good!! He knows exactly what we need to encourage us!!

I also was able to open my new CTMH catalog and wowzers... all I can say is my wish list keeps growing.  BUT the Lord has also reminded me that I need to be a good steward of what He has already given to me.  During the last month of the quarter (Dec. 2012), I was able to spend a little bit of Christmas money that I got and get some goodies and I can't wait to actually start to create with all of it.  I'm debating whether or not  to rename my crafting blog to Red Letter Krafts... not sure, but anyway, I've also been thinking that I should at least attempt to post something if I plan on using it as a future marketing tool.

In the next few days I will try to post a few nuggets that God has given me as I study more about being Steadfast.

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.   
                             2Timothy 2:15

I'm excited for what the Lord has laid on my heart and that I'm attempting to stay focused on what He has guided me to... not the fact that I want to do a lot but get so easily frustrated and discouraged when I think I don't measure up and that I'm not as "spiritual" or "creative" or "godly" or as "reknown", or "have a huge following" .... it doesn't matter - God didn't place the desire in my heart to be seen of man.. but to express my love and gratitude to Him.  I can not adequately express my overwhelming joy and peace knowing that the Lord has given me a desire to create for me, my family, and to bless others.  I know I'm NOT Nearly there... but I Will remain STEADFAST in trying!! Thank you Lord for TODAY.

Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of  Jesus Christ..
                         Philippians 1:6

Abiding in Him,
   Tiff

My New Year

So my old year has ended and the new one begun.. and I'm determined to be better this year.  As Christmas was drawing nearer and nearer, I was so confused and tired and felt overwhelmed by life.  But then I went to a friend's house for a bit of fellowship and boy what a night we had!!! I felt rejuvenated! The time spent with other ladies in song praising the Lord and fellowshipping over food was just an incredible reminder that I am not alone and that He always makes provision for me.  Thank you Lord.

I also decided that this year I will take more time for me - for who the Lord called me to be.  I know where my spiritual gifts lie and I know how He has directed me to cultivate them to bless others for His glory.  And in doing so, I've determined to focus on one attribute in my life that God has told me in no uncertain terms..."heya girlie... this is in desperate need of repair!!"  The word is Steadfast!!! Ouch ..like I didn't know I needed help in that area  (look at my blog..hehe).  So I have joined a community called OneWord365 - not the Ali Edwards program (One Little Word) and a sweet lady named Melanie was giving away customized blog buttons with your personal one word!! That Melanie (www.OnlyABreath.com) is a GEM!!!  Thank you Melanie and she will be hosting a link up every 15th of the month.  I've also determined that I will participate in a psuedo - Ann VosKamp One Thousand Gifts type of dealie - o!!  I realize that part of the reason I didn't continue last year was because the prompts (at times) seem contrived.. some were awesome and I could readily identify multiple blessings to fit within the prompts and other days I spent so much time hunting for blessings to fit into the prompts that I was left discouraged instead of thankful for what I did see as a blessing. So this time around, I will count 3-5 blessings that the Lord has impressed upon me and not to care how they seem to others.  WHEW... what a relief!

Lastly, I just finished reading Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst; that was an awesome read; the poor book is dogeared as if I've owned it forever.  Next I will be reading A Sudden Glory by Sharon Jaynes.  I'm so excited for all that God is showing me ...I will be taking the time to bless my husband, my home, my family, myself, my friends, and my others (ya know... the others that rub you like concrete against your knuckles)!

I will not compare my beginnings (in anything) to another person's anything - whether it be their beginning, middle, or established years.  I will not feed into my insecurities and allow that voice to convince me that I'm not enough.  I will attempt to be thankful for the lessons God will provide for me as I embark on my journey to being STEADFAST!!

Thank you Lord.

Still Abiding in Him,
   Tiff